Dating Power
Immediately I see the potential downfalls of chronicaling the events of a first date in a blog entry. And I see why this may stop some people from doing just that. And I would chose not to write it based on those facts if the date which I had last night went even remotely bad.
Now, I am not experiencing one of those Oh-my-god-I've-found-him-Stop-the-search type of dates, but I think I might genuinely want to see this dude again. Not out of a genereal interest in having a dude to date, but out of a gerneral interest in this dude.
If you were to take a look at my last post, you could probably gather that yesterday was a far cry from the best Tuesday that I have ever had. Following work I was tired, worn down, and depressed about having to shell out $60 worth of parking fines. Prior to this day - actually very prior - a friend had been promoting me in another circle of friends and had actually offered to set me up with this guy in her studio/design class. So since about February, she has been trying to set me up. Finally, following some recent information regarding the high success rates of set-ups (as in "I know this really great guy...mind if i give him your number/tell him about you?"), I decide that I will call and see if Jeff wants to go get a bite to eat. He says yes (which was probably obvious by the title of this entry).
I won't go into all of the gross details of the conversation; I will instead go into all of the gross details of my thought process during the 90 minute date. Beginning with a thought I had regarding the proper length of time to spend on a first date. I think that you can decide if a prospect has potential within the first twenty minutes, but the length of time to determine what that potential is up for debate. For example...in our initial phone contact, I observed that Jeff is very chatty. This has been something that I, myself have been accused of so I decide to give him the floor and listen to his day: he is a florist and art student. Based on this twenty minute interaction, I decide that there is some potential here...at least he is not afraid to be candid - and he has a nice voice. Set up the face-to-face.
Upon arriving at a predetermined restaurant, I spot a cute guy that looks to be not a day over 19. I am told by the host that this is Jeff. For those who know me only as a blogger - you should be let in on the secret that I like young looking guys. (I'm 25.) So as we procede with the date, and I decide that the potential that I heard on the phone trandslates very well into reality. He met some key objectives of my dating criteria: a) laughs at my jokes, 2) has never jumped out of a moving plane and has no future plans to do so, and c) eye contact! eye contact! eye contact! [complete list of dating criteria to be in a future entry]
So the date goes something like this (inner dialog):
"hmmm...i wonder what he would look like if with a buzz cut...Oh yeah! he'd look GOOD. I'm gonna have to save that idea for the third or fourth date. I'm not sure about that earring...very gay, but also very seventies - I can deal with it. It may serve as a source for gift ideas later in life. Now...I guess that I am eventually gonna have to learn to love that western New York accent; I am not moving anytime soon, and I refuse to be single past Valentine's day 2005. And I guess this must also be said about my desire to date a gay guy that doesn't act anything but straight - it ain't gonna happen, brian. Get over the fantasy."
While the inner dialog is going on the outer dialog revolves around family, high school, and taste in music. BORING (but nessecary).
(inner dialog): "NICE HANDS!!! Oh my...I can't wait for him to give me a massage...BRIAN! You are getting way too far ahead. Don't do this to yourself."
And this is when I knew that I would try to set up a second date. After we parted ways, we did what any gay man would do...we got on our respective celphones and reported back to the swetter-upper. "Keri...thanks for the introducing us. I had a great time. Call me as soon as you know what he thought."
So we have plans to get together on Friday. I'm hoping we continue to be as comfortable around each other as we were last night. Plus I am dying to see if I was right about the way he would look after i take the clippers to his head BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ....
Have a great thanksgiving!
Now, I am not experiencing one of those Oh-my-god-I've-found-him-Stop-the-search type of dates, but I think I might genuinely want to see this dude again. Not out of a genereal interest in having a dude to date, but out of a gerneral interest in this dude.
If you were to take a look at my last post, you could probably gather that yesterday was a far cry from the best Tuesday that I have ever had. Following work I was tired, worn down, and depressed about having to shell out $60 worth of parking fines. Prior to this day - actually very prior - a friend had been promoting me in another circle of friends and had actually offered to set me up with this guy in her studio/design class. So since about February, she has been trying to set me up. Finally, following some recent information regarding the high success rates of set-ups (as in "I know this really great guy...mind if i give him your number/tell him about you?"), I decide that I will call and see if Jeff wants to go get a bite to eat. He says yes (which was probably obvious by the title of this entry).
I won't go into all of the gross details of the conversation; I will instead go into all of the gross details of my thought process during the 90 minute date. Beginning with a thought I had regarding the proper length of time to spend on a first date. I think that you can decide if a prospect has potential within the first twenty minutes, but the length of time to determine what that potential is up for debate. For example...in our initial phone contact, I observed that Jeff is very chatty. This has been something that I, myself have been accused of so I decide to give him the floor and listen to his day: he is a florist and art student. Based on this twenty minute interaction, I decide that there is some potential here...at least he is not afraid to be candid - and he has a nice voice. Set up the face-to-face.
Upon arriving at a predetermined restaurant, I spot a cute guy that looks to be not a day over 19. I am told by the host that this is Jeff. For those who know me only as a blogger - you should be let in on the secret that I like young looking guys. (I'm 25.) So as we procede with the date, and I decide that the potential that I heard on the phone trandslates very well into reality. He met some key objectives of my dating criteria: a) laughs at my jokes, 2) has never jumped out of a moving plane and has no future plans to do so, and c) eye contact! eye contact! eye contact! [complete list of dating criteria to be in a future entry]
So the date goes something like this (inner dialog):
"hmmm...i wonder what he would look like if with a buzz cut...Oh yeah! he'd look GOOD. I'm gonna have to save that idea for the third or fourth date. I'm not sure about that earring...very gay, but also very seventies - I can deal with it. It may serve as a source for gift ideas later in life. Now...I guess that I am eventually gonna have to learn to love that western New York accent; I am not moving anytime soon, and I refuse to be single past Valentine's day 2005. And I guess this must also be said about my desire to date a gay guy that doesn't act anything but straight - it ain't gonna happen, brian. Get over the fantasy."
While the inner dialog is going on the outer dialog revolves around family, high school, and taste in music. BORING (but nessecary).
(inner dialog): "NICE HANDS!!! Oh my...I can't wait for him to give me a massage...BRIAN! You are getting way too far ahead. Don't do this to yourself."
And this is when I knew that I would try to set up a second date. After we parted ways, we did what any gay man would do...we got on our respective celphones and reported back to the swetter-upper. "Keri...thanks for the introducing us. I had a great time. Call me as soon as you know what he thought."
So we have plans to get together on Friday. I'm hoping we continue to be as comfortable around each other as we were last night. Plus I am dying to see if I was right about the way he would look after i take the clippers to his head BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ....
Have a great thanksgiving!
posted by brian. at 2:18 PM
