who cares?

Tiffany Granath: Playboy Playmate, star of Playboy TV, and host of Playmate Radio's Afternoon Advice on Sirius.

See also: Damaging character witness in Ryan Seacrest's alleged homosexuality.

I have, since coming out in 2000, had the "I don't care" attitude when a someone asks me if I think so-and-so is batting for the Yankees. This attitude comes in addition to the belief that all men are gay until proven otherwise - it seems a healthier way to live by thinking that everyone is an option.

And I have often publicly defended many a man's heterosexuality while secretly hoping, wishing, and/or knowing that they prefer pickles to tacos. Although you will hear this many times from many gays, I truly have a perfect hetero/not-so-hetero prediction record.

In keeping with my belief that the soundest and loudest political move any single gay person can make is to come out, I have come to realize that coming out as straight in light of skepticism is a double edged sword: the individual is shunned a by the gay community and championed by the right wing. I have decided not to be guilty of discriminating against a person who is truly straight just because they are not fitting into the mold of my perception of what a hetero should be: This is the basis of my "I don't care" attitude.

It is also the reason that I have accepted Ryan Seacrest as a poster child for heterosexual males that like to play with make-up and chat on the phone with members of Desperate Housewives. Trust me, if a man doesn't want you to know he sucks dick, you are NOT going to know. I mean, if he was truly in the closet, he'd be trying hard as hell to hide those overly gay tendencies (OGT's). However, I can only follow this logic so far.

The incredible female specimen above was the roommate of the not-yet-famous Seacrest, Tiffany Granath. This morning she, as a guest on The Howard Stern Show, revealed the following facts:

1. In the time she knew him, Ryan never had a girlfriend. She reports that he was never seen with a man either, so this may have just been a very dry spell for the four-foot-three cutie.
2. On several occasions the two would share a bed, and that on these occasions she would wear only a pair of panties. She reported that their cuddling escalated past Ryan kissing on her fun bags. (Ryan was reported to have been aroused, but Tiff states that she never touched his manhood.)
3. Ryan never once made a full court press to get Tiffany in the sack despite her frequently romping around the apartment in nothing but panties.

In response to Howard stating "If you were running around my apartment naked, I'd have banged you right there, and I even have a girlfriend," Tiffany did state that she believes Seacrest to be a woman loving man

I must say that I agree with Howard.

But I must also throw out the possibility that Ryan likes both boys and girls. It's an option that is scoffed at by both heteros and homos across the land, but according to Bisexuals everywhere, preference of pickles and tacos are not mutually exclusive.

Whatever the case, I think it may be time for Mr. American Idol to make an announcement of his preference. And I urge all of the world to believe him!

But like I've already said, I ain't never been wrong about a homo.