Why bother?

I spent most of this morning at planning meetings. Planning what, you ask?

Planing services that will help people who are at a societal disadvantage due to their HIV status. Planning fundraisers and transportation and support groups.

And I LOVE that part of my job. I love being on the front line and having my ideas heard and hearing the ideas of genuine thinkers.

What I hate that the people that we are advocating for treat what we do like something they deserve and they EXPECT all of their needs to be met ... and met immediately.

I am a die hard humanitarian. I am also a die hard believer in empowering people to help themselves. My beliefs are equal parts Darwin and Socialist. That said, I don't think anyone desrves anything more than what they earn, but i also think that everyone should have the same advantages.

It's times like these that I struggle with where to draw the line for services. Is that my call to make if I feel that able people are manipulating services which are the fruits of my hard labor, while at the same time using up resources that aren't garaunteed to be replenished? Where do we, as human service professionals cut the ties and let natural selection take over?

What about the guilt that follows when said individual dies because the only reason he was living in the first place was because of those ties? What about the people that have reduced access to those services that are dying on a daily basis because they don't know how to "work" the systems? Is that just Darwin?

Grrrr. I just get frustrated about the apathy in this country. Grrrrr.